I often bemoan the fact I have to keep our lifestyle secret. Surely life would be easier if I could be honest about what and who I am.
I don't ever see it happening. It's obvious whenever I'm in a bookstore or library and someone sees a book on a shelf concerning the lifestyle or, even more obvious, when I'm holding one. And their eyes travel from the book to my face and their expression changes to shock, or worse, disgust.
In the past I got angry. How dare they judge me? Who are they to determine what's acceptable between me and my Master?
But now? Now I pity them.
Because they will never know the beautiful mystery of submission. They will never experience the feeling of absolute bliss that is found under a Dominant's care.
So I'll keep my secret to myself, held only between me and my Master. And they can think what they want. The truth is too precious.
Love your blog! Could you please post reliable and trustworthy sources of information for those of us in small towns, who don't have access to a "network" or clubs?
ReplyDeleteI hate that too.
ReplyDeleteBut you're so blessed your Master is also your Husband and was your boyfriend. My Sir is not my boyfriend and he won't be. Is a pain in the ass dating and then have to tell the truth. Most of the people run away after that.
Dear Secret Sub Wife,
ReplyDeleteI have a question in hopes that it can be answered. I have always had a desire to be dominated and fully entrust my soul and body onto someone who is worthy. I have been with my Husband for 7 years and until recently, never shared my desire in fear of rejection. It turned out he also had a need to dominate. You can imagine my shock, 7 years and both of us living with our own secret desires. We have broached and begun light forms of BDSM, but I admit I am not fully satiated. I crave more than light play and am unsure how to tell him. I know his limits and some of my wants surpass them. I love this man and am happy and honored to be his but these feelings will not fade. Do you have any insight? Thank you very much!
Dear Secret Submissive Wife,
ReplyDeleteYou have know idea how much your blog has helped me and my marriage. I never knew that submission and dominance could create such a bond of trust between two people.My husband and I have just started our exploration of the sub/dom lifestyle. We both know our limits and what we are willing to explore. We don't have a set schedule we just drop hits when we are in the mood for some play. There are times when I want him to be more forceful but I can feel his hesitation or fear rather because he doesn't want to hurt me, but it only makes the need more intense. I have recently began to find it more difficult to release because my need is not being met. However, I feel like he would be doing something he is not comfortable with. He knows I trust him but the hesitation is there. I thought about creating a scene where , for lack of the right term, consensual rape but I am unsure of how to set that up. Any ideas or better suggestions?
Again thank you for your time and commitment to this blog.
Dear Secret Submissive Wife, I just found your blog and recently decided to come out of my shell. To be honest I was wondering and sorry if you already answered this question in a previous blog but, did you always know you were submissive and need a dominant in your relationships? I'm curious because I've always knew just never had the right partnership to explore that so the few guys i have dated i've had a conpletely unsatisfied relationships with was totally bored and at times down right disgusted. Im tired of denying myself the satisfactory pleasure and security that a bdsm relationship with the right person can give me and i can serve him. I always knew i was submissive especially in the bedroom. Can you maybe lead me in the right direction because I'm clueless as to how to start or even where. Please Please respond... I'm 43 single and have been for 5 years.
ReplyDeletedear submissive wife
ReplyDeleteI am kinda new to this... I've been married for almost 13years and with the same man almost 16years,and we have kids. I have always liked the idea of the guy telling me what he wanted me to do I don't want to think I just want to feel. I've never told anyone. I've tried to talk about the little things like would u ever tie me up to make love to me... or will u spank me... he is not into anything that I try to get him to try... do u have anything u can think of to get him to at least try it... I'm also really interested. I just want to show him that we could b so much better... Please help me out.... thank u so much.
i just did find your blog... i hope that u will post more... i love what i have read... i have been wanting to b a submissive for a little while now... i've been with the same guy for 16 years and we have been married 13 years.... i have tried to bring up little things i would like to do but he just is not into it.... i don't know what to do... i know that i really want to try to b myself.... my submissive self!! it feels good just writing it down to someone that knows what is going on. i have a good guy friend that is into being in a dom role... he really wants to b my master but with me being married it don't seem right to do things like that but i have to admit that this dom is hot as hell and u so want to submit to him.... please help.....
ReplyDeleteI found your blog almost a year ago. I love getting new information as my husband and I have been trying to move into a D/s relationship. I hope you write more. It really has helped me along the journey to realize that I thrive more in being a submissive.
ReplyDeleteLove the blog. I too live in a very small town due to having to move here and take care of my mother. I'm new to the life but miss it so very bad. As a sub it is a huge stress releaser. Taking care of a parent is a lot of stress. So how do u go about finding something in small town. Closest major town is 2 hrs away. Please advise if possible.would leave info but unsure
ReplyDeleteDear Secret Submissive Wife,
ReplyDeleteI know this is probably different from what you may have handled before, or maybe you have plenty of readers just like me, but I would like some advice. I'm an 18 yr old girl, I'm also a virgin, I had a bad introduction to sex by my stepfather when I was 8, only technically molestation, for years, He is convicted and in jail. I only tell you this to give you back ground. I first found out about BDSM from books, romance novels, not 50 Shades of Grey, which most of the BDSM community condemns. I find so many aspects of such a relationship a honest and giving D/s relationship more than appealing. I long for that type of safety and security, to be able to let go and have someone to take care of all the stress I face in my life. I don't know how to go about understanding myself and these wants. Can you help me? I know I'm young and I don't have much if any real experience in relationships, sexual or other but even as I tell myself these things there is a place inside myself that wants to please someone, wants to know that I've made someone proud by bringing them pleasure, craves someones help to bring myself to the best person I can be. I feel incredibly lost. My email megan102733@gmail.com in case you care to reply directly. I'm not embaressed by who I think I may be be. I may be naive putting an email out but how else do we learn if not by taking chances? If anyone else has any advice reading this post I welcome them to use this email as well to with luck help me find my way.
Struggling to Understand